This past Sunday afternoon I went out for a bike ride on the rail trail that runs from my part of town into the next. It’s a 40 minute ride out and back again, and the selling point is that for the most part, one doesn’t have to compete with road traffic with the exception of several intersections between the trail and busy streets. I’ve actually taken video of most of this ride and posted it at the Youtube site linked at the right site of this blog, but that’s another story. One intersection between trail and road is so busy the town recently put up a set of lights so joggers and bicyclists could cross in better safety.
On Sunday, I stopped at this very intersection, pressed the button on the light to cross, and waited until it turned red and displayed the “walk” signal. When it did, I started to cross when out of nowhere came a speeding, Giganta-SUV that is forced to come to a screeching halt to avoid hitting me while he attempted to run the red light. He stops, stares at me and the situation that he just narrowly avoided.
Now one could imagine what he might say, if he felt compelled to say anything:
“Oh Jesus, sorry buddy, I was in a rush and didn’t see you or the light. Are you ok?”
Sure, I could accept that. Accidents happen. Nobody’s perfect. We all make mistakes. But what did he actually scream at the top of his lungs?
“Hey you ASSHOLE, thanks a lot!!!”
What??? Apparently, I’m an “asshole” because he runs a red light with his wife and kids in the vehicle and almost kills me in the process??? I’m thinking: great demonstration of character for the kids in the back seat; I’m sure they picked up some of the finer qualities of their Dad from this incident.
This is but one example of selfish behavior I see many commonly engaged in that puts other’s safety at risk without reason. Polls also reflect the awareness that American society is becoming more inconsiderate and uncivilized in its public interactions. I find this trend quite disturbing, but what I also find disturbing is the suggestion from some that I should just ignore it, or shrug it off.
What’s happened to people that instead of having at least some capacity to acknowledging their wrongs and errors, they respond with heated indignation against the very people they’ve trespassed against? I know it’s human to find it difficult to admit when wrong, but I speculate: does it have something to do with what the wider culture now teaches? Have the fields of psychology and sociology so explained away guilt as an unnecessary social “artifact” of tradition and religion that it becomes difficult for many people to aspire to humility and listen to their conscience? I get the sense that because science has defined away anything like a belief in a conscience, this destructive behavior is part of the resulting consequence.
Can anyone explain?
10 comments:
The following comment, from a 23 yr. old YouTube fan, tells us something....
"The only News in the US that I can stand is The Daily Show on Comedy Central.Leans more to the left but atleast the left can see both sides"
It's only tangentally related, but another comment by said 23 yr. old....
"Now the Middle East is one sided but they deserve to be and I don't blame em for it in the least.I mean the news here makes them all out to be lunatics and it is not right.Only fair that they do the same and in that sense they are mostly right."
See? We're all lunatics. So are you.
Wasn't it Marx who said that Capitalism was like a solvent on tradition?
It's hard to pinpoint the cause of the coarsening of our culture. I'd agree with Farting that it's largely due to psychology explaining away any retrograde guilt feeling that may accompany any act in service of "SELF".
What does everyone say? Hey, take care of yourself.
You deserve it. You owe it to yourself.
Not to say that the self isn't primary in worldly considerations, but when the "other" becomes an object in the path of your attaining your next good, service or bright gleeming chrome thing, then you're doing yourself and the other a huge disservice.
I see things everyday that shock me to my core. These are not the huge things such as violence or theft so much as they are the little things that tell me that the person doing them does not acknowledge my person and probably would not acknowledge my person unless I'd held them up in some way from reaching their next destination.
Living in Dorchester the past 3 years has been an education in depravity and disconnection. I'm not speaking of my own misdeeds, which I try to attenuate down to zero, but of the trash tossing, the public argumentation at all hours at all high volume. I'm talking about people who dress like prostitutes and youth who dress like they're starring in the next N.W.A. video. They don't speak to you, they "rap" when you come close and they likely have headphones on or a cellphone that is beeping or "ringing" loudly.
I'd say there's some technology that has advanced the ability of selfish people to make more public nuicances of themselves than ever before.
My favorite annoyance in my neighborhood is people who part their SUV's in the intersection and get out to get a paper, or hit the bank or Post Office.
There's nothing you can do to compel them to move and they block one lane of traffic.... usually the right lane which is usually the moving lane.
The other week on my bike I watched this guy stroll out like he was in Aruba, waltzing on the pavement to collect a newspaper while I'm trying to eke around his large vehicle which is right in the intersection....a ticketable offense.
I don't know what the response to all the jackassery is beside just being a good example and when someone treads on you, let them know it isn't o.k.
Somehow things have to get better, but I have no ideas beyond that.
Jupiter mission anyone?
Nice post Dhun. Thank you.
Jupiter, I’m not sure about. But since I can’t emphasize enough the inspirational function of our space program, I don’t hesitate in mentioning that Mars is on the horizon:
http://www.nasa.gov/mission_pages/constellation/main/index.html
Another consideration on the decline of civility—beyond some misleading notions of psychology—is that in my experience most discussion in civics solely places a radical emphasis on expanded rights, rights to do this, rights to do that. The responsibilities of citizenship, however, are hardly ever stressed. The connection between freedom and responsibility for one’s choices within freedom aren’t usually part of the discussion, it seems. And I think the reason this is so is because of the modern confusion over “values” as being defined as something relative that originates from individual or group experience.
As a result, I think conscientious people tend to be afraid to level public judgments about poor behavior because there will always be that guru of multiculturalism, literally or at the back of the mind, reprimanding, saying that you’re trying to oppress others with your fascist or middle–class values, and that this urge is more than impolite.
We can be amused with postmodernism as an intellectual movement, its pretentious aversion to anything that smacks of truth assertion, and its merit (perhaps) as a corrective against episteilogical hubris. But it undoubtedly has had a tangible impact on the great mass of people today inside academia and as well those outside of it that couldn’t even begin to formally define Pomo but are nonetheless products of it. It seems to me that, to some degree or another, people walk around today in their own world with an inflated sense of self –without regard to an obligation to others—and get justification for doing so whether it has origin in a French intellectual movement, the social sciences, or illiteracy in civics.
Any appeal for restraint in public behavior is interpreted as an unreasonable intrusion on an unlimited sovereignty of self, and is of course met with a raging indignation. It is as if they have left civilization while still living within it, mentally returning to a state of nature and rejecting the imposition of most external authority as illegitimate.
There is also the natural human sentiment towards selfishness, but societal norms and institutions are supposed to curb or keep the more destructive expressions of this nature in check for the protection of others. Yet we observe reprehensible behavior on a daily basis, and it seems to be getting worse, not better. You raise a good question, Dhun, in asking: things need to improve, but how? Which is to ask: how do norms and institutions change?
Cultural change is slow. I suppose the answer to the above question is necessity, when things in our culture get bad enough. But what is that struggle going to look like, and without sounding too dramatic, will it be too late?
money quote: "It is as if they have left civilization while still living within it, mentally returning to a state of nature and rejecting the imposition of most external authority as illegitimate. "
Tonight there was an feature on NPR which sounded as if it were focusing on race in the marketplace/workplace. This one really articulate (aren't all guests to those programs extremely articulate and verbose?) Fedex employee who identified as an African American went on to explain how he'd never ever change who he really was, in order to climb the corporate ladder at Fedex. Cuz, you know, I've got a strong personality, etc. etc.
The grievance here is basically that Fedex puts a "diversity" face on it's employee book, but in reality they don't accept the unique characteristics of Joey McPerson because they're culturally insensitive or ignorant or just plain mean.
Personality morphs into character blurs onto the continuum of gender, class, belief, mythology, you name it, which comprises the identity of the person who is articulating some offense, or right they've discovered, based on any combination of the above.
Like you said earlier in your last entry in this thread... "The responsibilities of citizenship, however, are hardly ever stressed."
The responsibilty of the individual is probably downplayed because the repressive society hasn't owned up to it's part in the bargain. And what's that bargain, you ask? Rights unlikely to be found in our Constitution.
You never can tell, unless you listen to someone who formulates a grievance that is somehow the fault of the individual who failed to value the other's "truth". Now given the multitude of colors in the multicultural, postmodern-nothing-is-everything-is-equally-true view, you'd be hard pressed to not be trampling someone's "truth" daily, or at least giving it an unreasonable questioning.
I'm not so focused here, so I'll cut this here and just say that lately when I speak to others my age, they agree that there's been a coarsening of the culture.
The conception of government for many seems to be that it's purpose is to preserve everyone's private bubble, and then pick up the pieces when bad consequences occur from selfishness or isolation from the civic mind.
I believe our government enables bad behavior by providing institutional, maternal support, but by stating as much I have now unveiled the fact that I am a racist, jingoistic homophobe that can’t keep my nose out of other people’s "private" business.
Welcome T-bone. What and who do you teach?
Another explaination:
http://fallbackbelmont.blogspot.com/2006/10/multiculturalism-and-decline-of.html
Clearly we've had a lapse in security.
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